Supporting Children Through Tough Moments

Photo by Zahra Amiri

Sesame Workshop offers a guide for childcare professionals towards building a teamwork approach with families to support children through tough moments and big feelings.

An article by Manisha Tare, OT, MPH, a. Health specialist for the American Indian and Alaska Native (AIAN) technical assistance team serving tribal head starts programs across the USA, with more that 20 years of experience partnering with families and providers as an ECE practitioner, trainer, and consultant, notes that “when there is a disconnect between providers and caregivers [children] may feel that tension, and it can impact their sense of safety and security”.

The article offers the following suggestions of “bite-size actions to partner with families”:

Communicate with Intention:

·      Ask families to share any significant events that occurred overnight or in the morning that might affect their child’s mood.

·      Reassure families that boundary-testing is part of how children learn to express needs.

·      Proactively discuss how providers and parents prefer to communicate before a situation occurs to promote consistency and support collaboration.

·      Encourage response with curiosity and support, as opposed to worry or frustration, e.g. “You’re telling me you don’t like stopping yet. You are practising using your voice.”

Encourage Consistency:

·      Note that gentle, predictable routines can help little ones feel safe and settled, making big feelings easier to manage.

·      Share how simple habits - like a consistent bedtime - support children’s ability to calm their bodies.

·      Practice skills like taking turns, cooperating, and caring for others.

Pause, Reflect, then Partner:

·      Take time to process your own reactions and emotions before talking to families, so you can share your concerns in a non-judgmental way that invites curiosity.

·      Connect with a colleague to offer outside reflection before sharing your concerns with the family.

Build Bridges:

·      Invite families to share about changes at home or any new observations of their child as a gentle way to open up a sensitive conversation.

·      Be specific when sharing about a challenging behaviour and its impact.

·      Ask families for suggestions on how they might navigate these situations

Acknowledge Yourself:

·      Think about you are meeting your own needs and helping yourself to be feel more steady and ready to be with children through the day, e.g. a deep breath before the day begins, a favourite song on the way home, or a joyful moment with a caring friend.

·      Keep aware that we all benefit from support - it is tempting to keep giving even when your reserves are exhausted.

The article conduces by noting “it’s important to tune in to and be honest with yourself about what you need so you can set healthy boundaries with families, offer clear expectations and, most important, remember that the more you take care of yourself, the more you have to give!”